From a Land of Books and Other Diversions

"Classification of fantasy and reality is itself a fantasy that humans created, my dear motorrad. Life... It begins when you first make distinction between yourself and others. From that moment on, the world becomes a stage for the story in which you are the main character. All people live in a fantasy in which they are the main character."

"I see."

"But the world doesn't recognize you as the main character at all. What nonsense! Everyone lives their entire life tormented by this confusion! There is only one way out of this hell."

"To place yourself in a position that is neither the main character nor a supporting role. In other words..."

"Yes. The Author."

--Kino no Tabi, Land of Books

Some things can be summed up in cute cut and dried segments. The brief moments in time lend themselves to Twits, Tweets, FaceBook, and G+ among many others. Yet they lack any form of depth and do not lend themselves easily to longer posts.

Life has been full of many random distractions - many times thoughts are formed and lost like mist before the heat of the sun. Which has been driven home in the idea I'm now confident in my lack of ability to distill some thoughts in to a coherent form long enough to share them before the need forces me to move onto the next perceived process.

Maybe it's time then to dust off DI and set aside time for a mental swim instead of just splashing through the puddles between destinations...

sources of ignition

I know it's been a while, and there are a couple of links to update... but other questions/thoughts have been rattling around over the past few weeks to the point where maybe if i list 'em out my brain will be allowed to move on.

While on Hulu i came across the Dresden Files. The television series was fair, but it was enough to spark my interest to go out looking for the book series it was based on. I figured this would be a basic trilogy situation, easy to track and check out... to my surprise instead i found 13 books, and short-stories - even an RPG that all held true to the mythos. (I've read most of Stephen King's Gunslinger and the Dark Tower series but I still feel like Jim Butcher's Dresden Files has been my first real taste of Urban Fantasy. Maybe the Gunslinger was western fantasy? Have to think on that one later...)

Combine this hit with a binge on Anime, which I've not done in years, (okay i admit i was tired of lousy reality TV programming and reruns so this provided a much better source of writing and story lines) combined into a perfect storm of inter-linking chaos of patterns and concepts. One that led back on older musings of why humans do what they do. The most simplistic reasons seem to be a need to protect something - or maintain a status quo and a need to change - or change the status quo

Yet there seem to be other subsets lurking just below, usually tagged on to the top two but able to be its own reason and purpose to act or abstain from interference.

Survival will force a choice internally at some point that will cause action. Let's face it humans are hard-wired to survive and numbers can swing the balance.(but the debate of single v. group is one for another time)

Curiosity and the 'what ifs' - there seems to be some innate human need to test scenarios and change perimeters. I think this might be why games, card, board and computer have all had such a profound impact on world, as they allow a chance to learn without the general fear of impending death most of the time.

The other subset would be the business of risk v. reward. Seeking the payoff of the 'golden ring' either obsession drives us to the exclusion of all else no longer looking at the costs it will exact upon us in the bargain, or we see it's value to enhance our current situation and have bartered it down to what appears to be an acceptable price that may come with buyer's remorse later.

Something to think on later when it bubbles back up to the consciousness of this reality...

rambling update

DI has turned into more of a link archive for me -- a place i come on my way to other places. in a way i feel only slightly guilty for not maintaining more of a presence, with the ease and interactivity Facebook provides i've noticed a swing as to how/when i've been posting.

i know Facebook will auto take a blog post, wonder if a blog will grab a Facebook post.... something to explore in the future.

until then here's a quick update on current addictions some of which i plan to set up links to on the side for anyone else interested to visit their sites. some will be previous links that i want to make a bit more permanent - while others i've been visiting for awhile and have yet to mention.

my old WoW addiction has returned with the expansion with a much stronger focus on learning the lore through the quest chains.  i've completed a horde loremaster, and have started another for alliance -- sadly when it comes to quests and lore right now i'd give horde a large jump on two things - story line/quests (there's an actual sense of fighting for survival with storyline inclusion at times that i've yet to feel in any of the alliance quests... but there is still much to explore and do before a final decision can be made)

i never thought it possible but television programming may actually be getting worse. i can think of only a few shows i bother even thinking about keeping track of, the rest of the time the tele is on as background noise and a timer.

i'm in denial about selling the house any more... it's been on the market for awhile now, and between my questioning of what real estate agents do after they get your listing along with how every time the economy starts the government seems to try and put on the breaks i wonder just how long it will take to sell this place without giving it away.

on the plus side i've had the chance to explore some music groups i'd never heard of and start a few more anime series. i can honestly say i've become a even more cynical with the media industry where you get one gem in a large pool of dross (much like the news industry when they pick a lucky horse to beat to death...)

anyway out for now... look for link changes along the side in the future and if i can figure out a way to do it possible Facebook pulls later.

Stasis Comfort

I think it's the bleach /cough... with every breath I take it still smells like I'm at some indoor swimming pool. Not that I hate the pool, more rather I just don't like cleaning the shower/tub in the bathroom. The most success seems to come from using a bottle of cleaner then letting it soak *note to self: next house should if possible have a vent window in the bathrooms, those little vent fans don't really do much*

May have found a buyer for the house... still in a wait and see state of mind. It sounds good, but I've learned not to get my hopes up nothing bruises the ego like failing your, Star Trek Federation Luck Roll. However if this is successful I'll be able to find someplace that doesn't quite echo like this one does.

Job performance reviews are done for this year /cheers. It seems like every other year for the past while there is a shake up in supervisory positions at work which can make it hard to gain traction at times in accomplishing much in the trenches. I have some higher hopes this time though with this round - now we continue on and see what happens next.


With WoW coming out soon with a new expansion (12/07) I've been feeling a bit of a tug to reactivate my account... I'm guessing this is what it feels like to other addicts after a long hiatus from their drug of choice, to suddenly have a desire to go back and get another fix. I wonder if Blizzard realizes this release is on Pearl Harbor Day? You know that one day that will "live in infamy"-FDR.

To say I'm not seriously considering reactivating my account would be a lie. To wander a old/new world, exploring new places, seek out corners undiscovered does have some appeal, even if they are virtual... not like I'm using this life for anything else at the moment *and yes, even as I type these words out I realize how sad that sounds.*

I'm also waiting to see what will happen with DIII. Since the release of their latest class/character trailer the idea of waiting for a single player game vs. entry into an MMO subscription setup may help in making a decision.






Of course there is always the possibility of life taking another turn, until it does though I will make stasis a comfortable as possible :P A parting shot though paraphrased from a candy wrapper with quotes printed on it: "Pessimism is just Optimism with life experience."

Well I'm off for now, enjoy the vid, while ponder those final words -  

"you have a choice to be hunted or hunter."

Mixture of Ethereal Humours

Scattered are the thoughts that reveal occasional gems only to be covered again in the torrent of distraction brought by daily living. Just looking for a title that seems to fit can take one down so many different paths. For as Bilbo said long ago, "You step onto the road, and if you don't keep your feet, there's no knowing where you might be swept off to." There are some days that being 'swept off' doesn't really sound all that bad... although I do wonder at times how many things we take for granted every day that were discovered through sheer happenstance.


I'm taking advantage of the Indian summer here walking to/for lunch when possible. Not only does this provide a respite from the daily phone grind, but allows for the creation of vitamin D, a breath of fresh air and a chance to just think. You could almost call it a meditation of sorts, but rarely does it become deep enough to qualify - more a stream of consciousness as one empties the mind of one set of distractions allowing another set to slip in.

Recently the unfinished business of living comes to mind. Watching the world spiral and turn claiming completion of things that each succeeding generation will have to come to grips with. Some questions repeat others come at us reworded appearing new, but are they? If I'm not careful I get lost in the past and forget the future while other times I deny the past in hopes of finding a future...

The longer I'm in this status of quo the more i find that without a reason things don't change, there's no reason (which just adds to the irony). Add at the moment that I just feel like a place holder, waiting for a change that may never come. I feel the world locking in around me... question is can i find a reason to break out.

Maybe I need a vacation a chance to stumble on a positive happenstance or two and see a 'real blue sky' or two...anyway I digress, something that seems to happen more and more often it seems.

Distracted

Realizations can be scary at times... like a loud noise in a quiet place many jump at the suddenness of it.

There are other types of realizations though, the ones that just grow into the soul for translation are the most interesting - for they seem to take nourishment from our daily experiences to grow into one of those internal puzzle pieces that help us explain this reality. . .

Most of these are lost in the noise of existence, hidden in the cacophony of life. It is usually when you find out just how loud the silence can be you trip over some of these little pieces and try to make sense of them. Only the owners of the piece can truly discern their meaning, although many others will try with varying degrees of success.

As for me at the moment. . . i'm beginning to believe i live from one distraction to the next.

Actually i think most of us are living this way. Trying to dull the void or push back the encroachment of an existence in a world the we don't want to figure out or deal with at the moment due to all the interruptions that seem to swirl around us. For as annoying as this distraction is, it is known... we know not what will we find if we listen to the silence - or if we have seen what is there will face it or flee?

The question that perplexes me at the moment is this distraction trying to teach me something, or is it hiding something i will need later?

Just one more thought from life's drifting state of stasis...

A Little Grist for the Mill

I recently got back to watching some more Dexter. It's been over a year since I've had a chance to continue my journey from season II to season III. There's just something about watching Dexter that seems to put me in a reflective mood. Combine that with my long lasting slight depression and it can make for some really deep introspection at times. Maybe that's part of it's charm?

Along with all the other chaos or lack thereof inside, depending on your point of view, I've started to try and identify my tet. There are a few general outlines, however I'm not sure if there is anything that might akin to those higher levels tet that ka creates.

Another splash in the psyche was the rounds the simple idea of "Choosing or Being Chosen" seemed to make inside. Part of the idea exhibits control, either in the taking or possible granting to others. Denial is ever present in this model as either side may terminate the exchange, thus reducing the experience to a battle of wills or a nullification of sorts.

That however is a divergent path from the brain twister though. Do we choose our path or is it chosen for us? In many ways it feels much like a forcing of the wheel that pushes us all. Nature abhors a vacuum and it doesn't take much to be sucked in and turned to grist between the stones of time.

Yeah it sounds a bit absurd, even corny, but that is just the state of mind I'm in at the moment... don't worry the colors of khaos are bound to shift again when you least expect it.

Of These Thoughts Reoccuring...

Alright I admit it - the bag post was a red herring.

There have been many thoughts that seem to be lingering just under my conscious mind. Tidbits that when I get the chance may prove as interesting entry points into a disheveled psyche. Most of these I only have a tenuous grasp on to say the least so forgive me if the following is a touch cryptic and cluttered below, as it may just be a list of words that some how have gained correlation in my brain.

mass news media, government, reality, herring, slight of hand, behind the curtain, pandora's box.

many flavors of being alone, lost in a crowd just like lost in a field, chameleon skill, double edged, empty, stasis, waiting, movement.

introspection, literature book/movie - can movies be literature? anyway . . . insight, internal external change, observance, clarity or loss of?

more with less, lost, found, anticipation, precedent, responsibility, requirement, ability.

I still feel like there is something more... just out of reach but fate seems to decree that it wait until another time.

WoW Free

Well it was bound to happen... it did before and most likely will happen again...

I've been loosing interest in the grind now for awhile. The changes have homogenized game play, and in many cases made it to casual. So I've broken free and started looking in new directions.

There are some old games and new ones that have caught my eye - - and I'm finding a resurgence in the desire to find a martial arts instructor for training in stress relief... Tai Chi sounds good but there aren't to many of those instructors I know of here in the wild.

Also having a strong desire for travel - drawn more to the coast again. The ocean calls. Question is will it be by plane, train or automobile. I've been looking on Amtrak's site and have found some places that look like the ride would be worth it... catch is more time than anything else, wonder if they have any 'circuit' routes.

In order to fill the need to travel it looks like getting a passport might be handy, haven't had one of those in years...

Until then I've opened a trail account on CoV (City of Villains), yeah I know it's called CoH (City of Heros) but honestly the only class I like and have fallen in love with is the Master Mind and well it's a villains only club :P

So far the other MMO types I've been looking at haven't been as quick with updates and info as I would like so that's become a waiting game. One bright spot though, not really an MMO, is the reboot of the MechWarrior line. Looks like they will be providing free downloads for Mech 4 with all the added perks and expansion sets... I may just disappear for a few days when the happens :)

No Bang, or Whimper - LU

The past few weeks have been a constant onslaught of various tidbits of information, both relevant and worthless. Information and propaganda whirls through the air, and across the air waves in an increasing thick fashion.

It's just a matter of time i think before one of two things happen... both will cause a paradigm shift the question is which way. Honestly I'm not really sure if it matters anymore - and I think the end of the world will come with the mental short circuit in massive part caused by information overload and a slow bureaucratic governmental death.

We no longer look to find the answer, rather we just want someone to tell us what the answer is. Our freedom is simply granted to the slickest media campaign in hopes that they will give us the answer we seek - while for those who try to resist one view point find it only a matter of time until the correct one is legislated to them.

Are we trying to become an 'error free' society?

So scared of failure, being rebuked we have lost the will to move alone?

I've noticed my human communication skills have started to slide again recently - mainly from my own stupidity. Or maybe this is just my own introverted cycle telling me it's time to step out of the group again, that some quiet time if I could find it would help soothe the soul.

I'm beginning to think this reality is built for the extroverts... a game I can only play for short bursts like the cheetah chasing down the kill. My success is hit and miss though.

The 'net has become my drug of choice along with food/drink at times. I'm a firm believer in there are two ways to hide - one is in the distance away from everyone, the other is right in the thick of the crowd. The 'net is a perfect blend of the two, especially if you're an MMO type - as you can be in the middle of nowhere physically, and stand in the middle of countless players on a server somewhere else :P

I lost track of the anime again - but have continued on a slow enjoyable Lost pilgrimage (I'm in season 3 about half way through).

WoW span is still there - I moved Ark over to a PVE realm, which for the paranoia of PVP escape was nice - although I miss the old guild. I did a major culling of the stable and have gone out and tamed 3 of the pets I've enjoyed most over the past few years. They are all old models and bring a bit of nostalgia with them. -- scary, just the fact I've played this game so long that "nostalgia" can even be used in a sentence is...whoa.

WoW is slowly loosing me - in the beginning it was all about the exploration, and although I still enjoy it I'm starting to feel the tug of the social. The repeativity of the tasks and stagnant nature of the world slowly drains it of it's color placing it in the category of excellent primer but after you've lvl'd a few toons you just can't do it again. Combine this with the slow simplification and greater casualization one has to become proficient in raiding life and the slow grind of a 20/40 man existence or start other forms of entertainment (I'm lvl'ing pets, and experimenting with odds and ends that i never paid attention to before)

Well enough of my longer inane rambling for now - although this is far more therapeutic than facebook will ever be. Kind of like the difference between passing everyone in the halls at High School and meeting someone for coffee somewhere else :P

Shotgun Connections

Warning: Recognized Possible Rant Ahead - from thinking through the fingers.

Seems like a rather fitting title for what has become the human norm for human interpersonal communication. All the Blogs, Face Book, Twitter, My Space, Txt Msgs, E-mail, Phone, it all comes in haphazardly in a wide spread fashion. Each declaring "I'm right here" - the phone adding the immediate requirement of asking the following question, "What are you going to do about it?"

This mode of communication has become a fun high tech armor to push those around us out of wounding range. For in the din and chaos everything is said, but nothing that you really need to hear. Each layer exists either as white noise, or encrypted to the point of carrying meaning only for the person who sent it...

And as all this communicational drivel is happening - does anyone notice what is really happening. We splatter information across the whole world, many in sawed shotgun fashion, trying to grow closer we only push ourselves further apart... only the spam marketer seems to listen as they craft ads to fit our specific need.

Electronic social interaction has taken on a huge lvl of popularity which makes me wonder - is it because you are forced to give the other person a chance to edge into the conversation ever 255 characters?

I'm just as guilty, I've grown tired of humans; those that want to be spoon fed the information - that need their shoes low-jacked with small GPS chips in order to find them.

Has the art, need and desire of self sufficiency died in the individual? Has the power of deciding our direction been passed on to the bureaucratic dictatorships of the world? If so then there really is no longer a reason to complain about the SNAFU'd FUBAR we are all sliding, and sometimes running toward.

/rant

Time to go hide from the world again, and why do I suddenly have an urge to go watch Firefly?

Interruption Free

Is there such a thing?

If humans are close is it possible for them to do anything without interrupting others?

I admit I'm guilty of it too at times.

Is it a social flaw?

We can't tend to leave anything well enough alone until it's done we need to poke, touch, talk about, etc. until either the original objective is made moot and incomplete.

Polite society - if there is such a thing, forces us to drop what we are doing and acknowledge the person attempting to cause us terminal thought derailment.

Short of chasing everyone away, is there such a thing as an 'Interruption Free' existence?

*Oh this is one of the top reasons why I call the phone 'EVIL'

Loss of Dreams

omni mutantur nihil interit*

Life is a grind, and sadly though I sleep my dreams are kept from me. Aspirations are lost in what appears to be the realities of this world around me.

I had heard of The Sandman series a long time ago, but had never had a chance to read them. There are around 75 issues, and thanks to the power of the web and the inter-tubes I've had a chance to take a quick look. I love the premise:

There are seven beings that are not Gods, that existed before humanity dreamed of Gods, and that will continue to exist after the last God is dead.

There are seven beings that exist because, deep in our hearts, we know that they exist.

There are seven beings that are called The Endless. They are, in order of age, Destiny, Death, Dream, Destruction, Desire and Despair, and Delirium, who was once Delight.

Many ideas and concepts have always fascinated me, probably why I enjoyed Peirs Anthony's Incarnations of Imoratlity series growing up. I admit though I didn't do a through reading of Sandman, but even as I went through there were bits that caught my eye and stuck with me.

Either way it made for a nice reminder of the power dreams have, and the eternal nature of the aspects that exist in our daily life.

Everything changes, but nothing is truly lost.*

In a way the thought is a comfort. . . that somethings are eternal, and will continue on even after we are no longer around to watch it.

Which kind of raises the question. If you could live forever - would you?

Something to sleep on - - who knows one day I may remember my dreams, maybe they will become a reality. . . until then.

*Latin, and translation

Whisper'd from Khaos

I was reminded/relearned something valuable last night. . . nothing more than a whisper in the chaos and din of battle. To focus on the message would have meant death for our party, but it lingers still. . . in bits and pieces - an extension of the three classes, I guess.

I was tanking in Maraudon many times completely surrounded by mobs, stunned, silenced, but still by some mystery holding their wrathful attention, walking out of the rubble, surviving to the next battle from what should have killed me in the previous. If it wasn't for the excellent healing this experience would have been very scary and even more masochistic. (anyone can piss stuff off - living through it is a different story :P)

This is the first character I've had that could tank this zone, that was prepared for this purpose. I've been the healer here many time, even DPS'd my way through both alone in areas and in groups, but tanking is different.

DPS does it's best to be self-sufficient - their trick is to do as much damage as possible without pulling the attention of the target. Purpose: to end the conflict through superior firepower. The Weapon

Healers watch the big picture doing what they can to keep everyone alive, they see the patterns and in many cases will pick up on things that might be overlooked. Purpose: to heal through the chaos around them, restoring life through mana and in some messed up situations through sheer will alone. The Heart

Tanks are a focal point they want to be hit, every hit they take is one that someone else doesn't have to - but they are completely dependent on healer to keep them alive. Purpose: to hold focus and endure, to take the hits so others don't have to. The Shield



I'd dare to say that the healer/tank relationship is the most symbiotic for without one the other will fail. It's probably one of the reasons I enjoy pet classes so much - they are their own microcosm of this dynamic.

I guess I can boil it all down to one word in the end though - Trust.

Still thinking on this one. . .

BSG Passacaglia - S3 Filler?

Well being the Battlestar junkie I've become from season's 1, 2 and Razor I'm kind of torn on season 3. There is some movement in plot, but I get the strong feeling that the Cylons might have a plan, and the writers don't.

There are a few key bits of information provided during the season, and I'm curious to see how season 4 pans out. I know I'll get it just to finish the storyline - for good or ill i'm funny that way.

Currently though one could almost discount season 3 as 'filler', leaving one feel as though they are the Joker talking to the Thief. . . never would have guessed that "All Along The Watchtower" was an old rock tune (youtube.com even had Jimmy Hendrix doing a version, and sitars will go only so far in adding a touch of the exotic - - does that mean Cylons are really from earth? :P)

Sry but for all the effort they have put into making the music unique to the world they have created this really disappoints me. The illusion is shifted but not destroyed. . .

Spoilers and Theories : (highlight to display)

My only hope is that Kara is a ghost frakking with Lee's head - similar to the Baltar and Caprica 6 mental schism that they have been playing with the entire series. It adds an extra punch to the prophecy of the hybrid in Razor that she would lead humanity to its' doom. Sorry Gandalf's already done this shtick and it's become a bit more cliché since then :P


The President is Cylon model number 12 - - the cancer and the camala extract is frakking with her system and prevented actualization. (wonder if she died and got a new body would cancer be introduced into the collective?) Gotta love those deleted scenes when you find out that what she does in the opera house is "projecting" - which is probably why it got cut.


Cylons can progress no further in their evolution and have become genetically stuck - their only hope is to join with the humans - to create hybrids of both races. To this end they couldn't just ask to be let back in, the first cylon war fixed that. So far they have tried through destruction, dominance, and subversion, but only Athena's biology has become more than her original build. (hmm - when she died did she pass the immunity to the collective? or did she loose her own immunity with the transfer to a new body? or is it a moot plot point - just another red herring like the cylon detector?) - - How long have they been afloat in space and these main characters working in key locations never got scanned? Even Bulldog had to get a scan after being released/escaping from his basestar prison.

Candy Coated

Hope everyone had an enjoyable Easter. I thought about posting this little clip a couple of days ago, but for some reason it didn't happen, anyway it was found with the e-cards on someecards.com, great site though not really for kids, and it brought a startling reality to light for me. I'm not sure if the western world can face anything serious - I mean really face fear and handle it.

For generations now we have been consumerized, medicated, dosed and deluded to the point where the serious issues we face are nothing more than sound bites. Buried in almost too much information I begin to wonder if we have really have become a twisted version of Plato's Cave, content to live in the shadows. Buried in the burocracy that now defines the world that western civilization has become.

And The Three Classes Of Life Are. . .

Healers. Tanks. DPS (the Damage Dealers).

Healers - is pretty self explanatory, even if the wounds are not.

Tanks - the damage sponge and defender, holding the attention of one world to allow another to be created.

DPS - what is a defense without and offense, as not all dangers are benign, and nature has found only 3 ways to avoid extinction - - overwhelm (out produce), avoid (leave), remove (kill)

All of us are a hybrid of these three. Our strengths fill out our main role in this life, while we learn other abilities during the rest of our journey. These three aspects seem to hem in our existence and at times we find ourselves filling roles we never planned for, but we do the best we can with them.

It's the manipulations we endure I have yet to place in this thought process. . . for as this may explain a "What" it does not explain a "Why".

Which is why this post sounds so half baked, not so much due to a loss of reality, but the inability to fully explain it all.

Still thinking on this one. . .

Balanced Chaos

Like all true flames of chaos you just can't get that close without a first aid kit handy. The difficulty seems to lie in the discovery of which flames are open to adapt to us and which ones we need to adapt to.

I'm still learning this first step and fear it may become on of those lessons that will take many lives to understand.

So far the balancing of the two toons has gone well. I have to admit healing in plate adds a hellova lot more survivablity than the cloth my priest had :P and using the 'lock for the daily PVP quests adds a broader understanding. Each serves a purpose be it to restore health or provide death.

Sometimes I wish real life was as easy. . . there is a juggling act there that few if any master. The one of blancing the Yea's and the Nay's - as society has shifted from self reliance to take anything offered, but don't ask the price - we'll let someone else pay for it later. And for some reason yet unknown guilt seems to growing in streangth where common sense used to exist.

So much to think about, won't be long until only the numb remain - immune to the flames, hollow from growing thick defences to survive one world and then live in another - be it of mind, spirit, or soul.

Blisshock

At the start of the year I had it for one brief moment, I thought "this is it, so peaceful, so quiet" the world was for a short time at peace. It was strange, even when logged into a World of Warcraft PVP realm everyone seemed to be content (no knives in the back), which for me playing a PVE game on a PVP server felt almost therapeutic.

I really need to learn to schedule my vacation time when the kids are IN school - I feel like I sync'd myself up with a cult of masochists. Not sure how my sister handles it so well - - me I'm looking forward to work on Monday just to get away - my sanctuaries are dwindling in number and location, but endurance is a must - even if they won't let me use shock collars to keep the noise down or get their attention >:)

Hope the gods smiled on you all through this holiday season - that you found your wishes as New Years approached. Sometimes I wonder if the ball really dropped - or if in my case it just bounced a little before rolling out of sight to leave me guessing if the new year has really started :P

I'm hoping to post more this year, and if possible shorter blurbs vs. the mass brain dumps that I find myself prone to do (it's about the only resolution I've considered) Maybe if I break up the bliss and the shock of this life it will be easier to digest.

With the current state of the world though I'm beginning to wonder - do ear plugs add resistance to the Machin Shin, with the madness that seems to follow. I mean hell you can't seem to kill it so you can try to resist or join the voices - - -

Either way brace yourself as the politicians ramp up the volume of their rhetorical rhetoric. They may be talking, but is anyone listening? I don't think even they are any more. . .

I fear the hardest choice the world may be forced to make seems to be the politicians or the demagogues. One day I want to choose between the greater goods instead of the lesser evils :P

HBO - A Fluid Exisitance

There are days I grow weary of human contact. . . pets included. Although I'm more understanding of pets, even when they are overly whiny, as it's hard to hold them to any sort of logic when the patches aren't quite connected, even that will only last so long though. It's different with adults - - I usually expect more from them, the cause effect patches should have connected by then.

Expecting more usually comes back to bite me, generally in the form of extra work and the nagging question of "How did I do this to myself again?". (usually it happens when I make the mistake of answering the phone :P)

What happened to the ideas of self-sufficiency, and living up to the responsibilities taken on? Is it me, or has the world has become more fluid? Everything feels more political by nature as the world begins to play more and more toward the mob, a glutton of the present that does not see the hollow future.

A brief reminder of those words of wisdom from The Case of Dexter Ward by HP Lovecraft

I say to you againe, doe not call up Any that you can not put downe; by the Which I meane, Any that can in Turne call up Somewhat against you, whereby your Powerfullest Devices may not be of use. Ask of the Lesser, lest the Greater shal not wish to Answer, and shal commande more than you.